When we are children, we are of course controlled by our elders as we are not able to think rationally with good judgment and make reliable safe decisions for ourselves. As we mature into our teens, many of us know what is safe or not, correct or not, and are able to make the choice, as to whether to proceed into the right or wrong, safe or danger zone. Of course we may often make errors in judgment, even as we get older, that leads to a learning experience, be it in relationships, life or business ventures, and that is fine, as this is how we learn.
I personally have found that when I go with my intuition, it is usually right, when I am unsure and give others the benefit of the doubt, that I hope they may prove me wrong with my uncertainty. It is then, in that hope that I could be wrong, that it usually fails me and I end up in a problematic situation.
Often we are misjudged by others by the way we look, dress, act, or even the job we do, and other people can behave accordingly due to their ignorance. They don’t look at the real you, or even want to take time and find out about the real you. However, what they often want to do is to try to manipulate and control you, for their own selfish purposes and satisfaction. Being controlled like one of the sheep is most definitely not what I personally stand for, and will most definitely retaliate with speech and decisive actions. I have a mind of my own and will always stand for what I believe is right, I speak my mind and yes, it often gets me in trouble. I refuse to be manipulated by anyone just to conform and keep others happy.
Should we be expected to change our personality in order to keep others happy? I don’t think so! If we are changing our character to make others happy, worried about how we behave and what we say, then surely we are just hanging around the wrong people, and it is time to let them go and leave them as soon as possible at the next stop and continue our life journey, without those people.
As we proceed our life journey, those friends, family and/or associates may end, and it will almost end up as a process of people elimination. Some people will be around for a short term, as we fall out, and others will be around for the long hall of our life journey, through the good and bad. They will accept your behaviour as you accept theirs, there will not be a fight of taking control for personal gain, instead, it will be a mutual support for each other with no selfish intent. These people will allow you to speak your mind, whether they agree or disagree with your thoughts and behaviour. They will in fact agree to disagree, and that is how it should be. They will have your back as it were, look out for you and just be there for you, no matter what.
Having your own mind and doing what you believe to be right as a child, teen or mature adult, can be misconstrued that you are a wild child and troublesome, instead of being seen as an independent individual with a mind of your own who will stand your ground for what you believe in. People with their own strong mind are often well behaved and like nothing more than peace and quiet. However, when their boundaries are pushed and their harmony is disrupted, they will just speak their mind, action against it and it is then mistaken for troublesome and out of control.
There is nothing wrong with being ‘out of control’, so long as you are not verbally or physically abusing anyone. Just be straight, say what you feel and need to, act accordingly. You are just doing what you believe to be is right for you at the time, for your own self-preservation and wellbeing. It is your choice and your right to do what you want, for you personally.
Unfortunately for the controllers and the manipulators, well they will be very disappointed that you won’t be conforming and playing in their usual game, but that really is their problem not yours, and most definitely not worth losing sleep over.
It important to be yourself and just be you. Don’t change yourself to fit in with others. Be amongst others that simply fit in with you.
Be ‘out of control’ as you ‘take control’!
Love and Sparkles
Samsara x
www.samsarabellydancer.co.uk